Nuckin Futz, that’s what my Elf is.

Mr. Futz came to us via Target, and let me tell you. I’m about ready to sue. I KNOW the Christmas Angel is. In fact, I just got subpoenaed by Santas Sheriffs and Glorious All Red, the Christmas Lawyer Elf keeps calling confirming that I will agree to be voir dired in The Elf’s Court.

Really…I don’t need this shit right now…

And although a restraining order may be enough to keep Selena Gomez safe from her stalker, my Christmas Angel, well…she ain’t so lucky.

Aint that somethin’???

Son of a…..

This elf is putting the “Jesus H. Christ on a popsicle stick” in Christmas…